Trial and Error – Isn’t That the Way We Learn?

How do you create self confidence in your child and offer support, particularly when the child is fearful of trying something new?

I was reminded about this subject when the son of a friend of mine started psychologically readying himself for his first year of college this fall, albeit with fear and trepidation.

There are, of course, ways of creating self confidence and persistence in your child. One of the ways, is simply to remind the child of the times he took responsibility for his actions and choices, and what the outcome was – hopefully, positive! Perhaps you could even review how your child found ways to make some type of contribution with peers, siblings, or in the community.

Kids need to learn to make decisions for themselves, and not use their parents as crutches. This alone instills self confidence. That willful or shy spirit you may have seen developing during elementary school must be polished through trial and error. Even if you do not always agree with your child, he can only learn to accept and value himself through trial and error.

I believe it is up to parents and mentors to provide safe opportunities to explore interests without interference, and to notice and praise the emerging self-awareness of your child.

In the “Total Transformation Program”, it is suggested that, “If children don’t learn to think for themselves, and the adults in their lives do it for them, as teens they are much more likely to follow peers into choices that can have devastating results.”


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