I published a Parenting Workbook last year which you can certainly see on my website and blog site. Here I’m actually going to quote myself. See if it has significance for you.
Most people define themselves through the content of their lives. Eckhart Tolle, NY Times best-selling author and contemporary spiritual teacher, explains in his book, The New Earth, “Whatever you perceive, experience, do, think or feel is content.” He meant that content is not your true essence, which is the part of you that does not make judgments or is consumed by the ego. He goes on to say that people differentiate what is good or bad, based on their perceptions, and this is a fragmented way of thinking. Many of our beliefs come about from the ideas we have formulated about ourselves through the content of our daily life.
If a child is reared to believe in the opinions that others have of him – his family members, his school and community, and the part that culture and religion plays –it is possible he will come to the conclusion that, “ I am not important; I will never be successful, I am not worth anything, I will never be smart enough.” Once this child has these perceptions and beliefs, he is at a huge disadvantage because it’s difficult to imagine how successful you think he would be in creating positive circumstances for himself. How successful would he be in loving himself, or carving out a career he could feel good about? And, how would he treat other people, including his own children when the time came?
Beliefs are often unconscious – stored in the subconscious mind which can’t differentiate between reality and illusion, truth or untruth, right from wrong. When you have the understanding of why you are holding on to a negative belief, you will be much closer to being able to rid yourself of it, because you’ll realize it doesn’t serve you anymore nor does it help your child to have a healthy mental attitude.