In my previous blog I wrote about helping children to be free from anxiety and stress. While it’s very difficult to ignore the everyday realities of our world, it’s still possible for us to create inner peace and teach our children to do the same.
We can teach children how to think in ways that keep them emotionally and psychologically balanced.
People with self-esteem and who are centered, usually understand that events in their lives derive primarily from their own actions. This certainly can be taught to your child through modeling this type of responsible behavior. As an example, a child is following a lead you teach when he/she comes home with poor grades on a test, and takes total responsibility for failures and doesn’t blame it on the teacher or illness for example. Kids or adults without this type of self-effacing attitude tend to blame external factors and/or others as a reason for failure or unhappiness. If you want to teach a child to take responsibility of his/her actions, lead by example.
If you are constantly degrading yourself with negative comments, living day to day with low self-esteem, and demonstrating to your child that you don’t think highly of yourself, then you’re certainly not in a position to help raise a child’s self-respect. It’s essential to model self-respect if you want it to rub off.
Not only that, but it’s vital that you have your own life “together”, otherwise you’ll appear inauthentic.
There is no better answer to a child’s negative attitude than a positive example. To a child who is not motivated, there is no better example than a motivated parent. The angry child is best answered by a calm person. The prejudiced child is best answered by a tolerant person.
Here are some examples of negative programming you may inadvertently pass along.
“How can I ever enjoy myself with all the trouble you cause me?”
“Some people have all the luck.”
Here are some positive alternative statements:
“People make their own luck.”
“We can find something positive in this for all of us.”
Even if you haven’t overcome all your emotional hurdles, and who has, you can try to be aware of what you say and how you say it. Sign up at my new website at www.journeytowardknowledge.com and I’ll send you my FREE Tips and Techniques parenting newsletter.